ARE YOU READY TO COMMIT TO A RELATIONSHIP?
If you desire a long lasting, healthy, and fulfilling relationship with a partner whom you can share life with, then before you commit to a relationship you need to arm yourself with the knowledge of attracting your highest and best partner who will align with who you are. Mastering the right relationships skills is crucial to your success to creating the relationship of your dreams with your loved one. If you start with the right foot, with the right knowledge and understanding of who you are attracting and what you are going into, you can almost insure yourself a long lasting and happy relationship.
Intimacy
Closeness with a person takes time to develop. And there’s more to intimacy than physical contact. Intimacy can mean a hug during a tough time, a smile of encouragement in the face of adversity and compassion when you least feel like giving. Don’t abuse or take advantage or the other person. And don’t let yourself be abused or taken advantage of. Intimacy takes commitment and sharing. Ask yourself if you will be willing and patient enough to take time to develop closeness with another person. If you find that you cannot even handle your own emotions during a tough time, then it is almost a sure sign you need to work on yourself more before you even commit to a relationship.
Are you able to say "No"?
You don’t always have to be voiceless or agree with someone in a relationship. Be able to say, “No” and be an individual, too. Ask yourself if you will be able to maintain your unique individuality while in a relationship. Do you find it hard to be alone at times when your partner is not around? Do you find yourself fearful of saying "No" when you really mean it? If you find you have a tendency to shift your centre and focus onto another person to the extreme, then, you would need to work around this and bring about a balance for yourself and your partner. Being in a relationship does not mean you have to change for another person. It does mean giving your partner space, and giving yourself space. Remember you are sharing life together, not taking charge of the other person's life!
Do you find keeping in touch a hassle?
Many couples tend to make the mistakes of taking each other for granted after a certain period into a relationship. We tend to get so caught up in our work life that we forget that we need to make the effort to keep our relationship alive too. Don’t let life separate you too long. With technology today, you can stay in touch with cell phones and email. No need to overdo it and be obsessive and controlling, but do stay in touch off and on throughout the day with quick “Hellos” and “How are things going?”. Make the Honeymoon Last. Remember how your felt when you first got together? Do those little things that you did at the beginning and make the honeymoon last. Bring home fresh flowers, shut off the television, turn on some music and dance with your mate, compliment your mate, make dates to go to places you used to frequent (the old neighborhood pizza parlor, a local drive in, a hotel you went to on your honeymoon, etc.). If after reading all these you find these are all hassles, then, you are not ready for a committed relationship.
Nuts and Bolts
Don’t focus so much on the “nuts and bolts” of who said what, when, how often and why they were wrong…. In other words, sometimes during an argument, try losing your memory of who did what, when and how many times in the past. Instead, humble yourself, apologize for having messed up and hug your mate! If you feel you’ve been pushed to the limit and don’t want to try one more time, close the door on that angle of the issue. Take a walk, get some ice cream and cool off (literally). Then return relaxed and refreshed, and open a window to air differences.
Trust
Healthy relationships involve people who trust one another. One person doesn’t get involved in unhealthy risks with a third party or lie to the other. There is an open, positive exchange of trust. So if this is lacking, seek help from a professional counselor, if necessary, and see what’s wrong. If you feel stuck in past emotional issues or you find yourself unable to forget your ex from a past failing relationship, you need to resolve this before you think about going into a committed relationship.
Are you ready for a committed relationship? Are you ready to settle down? If you meet someone you like today, would you be ready and available for them? The above considerations may help you to decide on just this. By: Dr. Robby Bilton
You may click here if you need further information before committing to a relationship.
Warmest regards,
SHENGLee
P.S. Don't rush into any kind of relationship. Work on yourself. Feel yourself, experience yourself and love yourself. Do this first and you will soon attract that special loving other.- Russ Von Hoelscher
